SeungHyun’s POV
It’s raining outside. I don’t have any strength to get up from my bed. I’m going back to sleep. Suddenly, my phone is ringing. Who is that? Who is the nerd calling me at this time? Err… I need to sleep with this good season, this holiday and of course, I’m too tired after finished my work last night. I don’t want to answer the phone. Whoever it is, I don’t care. I just want to sleep.
1 hour past, but the phone is always ringing. I couldn’t sleep at all because of this noise. I decided to wake up and answer the phone. Ouch, my foot is hurt by something. Shit, my flat is totally in rush. I just stepped on my binder. I think this mess was from last night when I stressed out because of my work. Okay, I need to answer the phone now or I will go crazy.
“Hello?!”
“Hello. SeungHyun-ah, can you come out today? I have something to tell you. It’s an urgent”
“Oww, Hi, JungMin. Hmm, I don’t know. I will call you later if I can go out. Ok?!”
“But… SeungHyun-ie, why? Are you tired?”
“Hmm, yeah, kinda. I didn’t have a good sleep last night.”
“Oww, okay. I will wait but it’s kinda urgent. Hmm, it’s okay, take a rest. Bye”
He hangs up the phone and I’m back to my bed. I can’t sleep again. His word ‘URGENT’ is always on my mind. What kind of urgent? Err… I think I should meet him. I’m kinda a person like this, always curious about something and I have to find out what it is as soon as possible or I will go crazy. I call him.
“Hello?!”
“JungMin-ah, I think I can meet you today. I’m awake now”
“Really?! It’s okay if you can’t. Don’t push yourself”
“No. I’m okay. Totally awake and not tired anymore. Where I can meet you?”
“Hmm, I’m still at home but we can meet at our former school”
“Former school? High school or middle school?”
“Middle school. Around 07.00 PM?”
“Oww, okay. See you there”
“See ya”
06.15 PM, I’m ready to go to the Kyeong Gi Junior High School, my former school with many memories. Good and bad memories were creating there. I drive my car with a maximum speed. Yea, the school is far away from Seoul. Why Jung Min wanted to meet me there? I just parked my car and wow, he already there. He’s so fast.
I call him. His face seems so frustration. What happened with him? He makes a smirk on his face. He waves his hand. I can see his light brown skin hand waving at me. I can see he wears a red shirt with white hoodie. He is so handsome like that. As a man, I could say that he is totally handsome but why he never has a girlfriend even at once. He was so popular during school time. I was quite popular too but not really popular as him, but I had a girlfriend before. Yea, that’s my memory from this school. I walk approaching him.
His face suddenly becomes so serious. I hear what he said. I got a big shock when he said that words. I don’t know what I should say. I’m so confuse and my heart is in pain now after hearing his words. My head is spinning around now. I want to cry but it’s impossible.
"It's okay. I guess since there's not much left from our relationship. Stop apologizing, I'm not that hurt anyways. But, just please be a better boyfriend to her", that’s what I said unconsciously. His face becomes so happy. It hurts my heart. My deepest heart is really hurt. He hugs me.
“SeungHyun-ah, thank you so much!!! Do you know why I brought you here and said that?”
“Umm, I don’t know. Why?”
“This is the place where I met her for the first time. And also the first time we met each other and became close friends, weren’t we? Truthfully, I was falling for her first but she had fallen for you and you two ended as a couple. I became a crazy man that time. I couldn’t think straight, my heart was so in pain, I couldn’t do things correctly at that time. I even forced you to break up with her. But when I heard that you two broke up, I was so happy. Err… Oops, was I said that? Sorry, I didn’t mean it”
“Oh, that’s okay. I’m okay. Yea, I’m okay”. That’s the last word I said to him before we aparted.
On the way home, I can’t think straight. I drive my car so fast. I want to cry. I stop at the bridge which interlinks the way to Seoul. I take my phone and I start to press the number of someone. Yes, I called Kang Mi Ji. Woman we had just talked about.
“Hello? SeungHyun-ie?”
“…”
“Hello? Hello?? SeungHyun??”
“Hi, Mi Ji. How are you? Long time no see”
“I’m fine. Thank you. What about you?”
“I’m so so. Mi Ji, can we talk somewhere?”
“Hmm, I don’t know if I can today. Is it urgent?”
“Kinda of but it’s okay if you can’t”
“Okay, I will meet you in front of my house. I know that it’s really urgent”
“Okay, see you there”
I drive faster than before. I need to tell her about this. But then, I think again. I shouldn’t do this. I think it will just show her that I still love her. I don’t want her to misunderstanding me. I was the one who broke her up. I call her again and say that I can’t come. I feel so sorry to her.
I put all of my things in the couch. I can’t think straight. I lay my body on the couch and starting to cry. What is this feeling?! My deep heart is really hurt. Tomorrow, JungMin will say to MiJi that he loves her and hope that he can be her Boyfriend. Damn, just think about it, I really want to die. I still love her!!!
I take a long shower time. I cry under the shower. I only wearing my jeans and I sit on my desk. I take my journal book and start to write something. I don’t know why today so many of my tears always running down into my face. It’s so strange. Whenever I had a problem, I never had these tears. Maybe because it’s about a girl I loved. Also the radio has After School’s song BECAUSE OF YOU. Damn, even the song is really in with my situation.
I put the paper to the envelope and keep it on my desk. I take my cellphone and I go to my bed. I lay down there and I call JungMin.
“Hello?! SeungHyunnie, what’s up?? It’s already late.”
“Hello, JungMin. No, nothing happened. I just wanna ask you something. Can you meet me tomorrow at the Café near our office?? I have something to tell you”
“Owh, okay. But, are you really okay?! Your voice is so different”
“Yep, I’m okay. Don’t worry. See you there, tomorrow. At 10AM. Ok?!”
“Okay. Is there anything else???”
“Nope, that’s all. Bye”
“Bye, Nites”
---------------------------------------------------------------------
The Next Morning.
I can feel that my eyes are so heavy. I look into a mirror and I see that my eyes have a big lower eyelids. I couldn’t sleep well (again) last night. I wear a white t-shirt, jeans and black hat. I drive my car to the France Café near my office. I see JungMin there. Hey, it’s still 09.45 and he already there. Great. I think he really wants to know and curious what will I say. I open the door and JungMin waves his hand to me.
We talk about MiJi. I give him an advice if he becomes a couple with MiJi. I know it seems like I still love her. But thankfully JungMin doesn’t get it. I inhale more air and sigh a little.
“JungMin-ah, I just want you to know this before you become MiJi’s boyfriend”
“SeungHyun-ah, I don’t know if she will say yes or no. We still don’t know yet, right??”
“Yea, I know. But you need to know this”
“Okay, what’s it???”
“1st, She can't drink. And then she hates the fume of cigarettes. She also hates being alone so, be with her always. Last thing; make sure you always remember her birthday”
JungMin understood and leave me because he still has an appointment with MiJi. I still sit on the café with sad expression. The rain and the song in the café really fit with my situation. The café playing B2ST’s song SAY NO! (Please Take Care of My Girlfriend). Yupz, just like what I want. I hope MiJi will say no to JungMin.
30 minutes passed. I still sit at the café. My cellphone is suddenly ringing so loud. It’s JungMin. Damn it!! I can’t hear what he will say to me. But then I answer him. My face gets darker than before after hearing what he said. I know I make a rotten smile right now. I close my cellphone and then pay the bill of the cappucino which I drank recently. I go out from the café and start to walk in the rain. I can feel the tears of mine going down again. But because of the rain, it’s barely to show people that I’m crying right now. I look to the electronic shop and there are around 10 television playing Wheesung’s song JUREUREUK.What happen with this day?? Why the songs always fit with my situation today??
I cross the road without seeing the traffic light. It’s absolutely still green for the cars. I can’t think straight right now. A big container is in front of my eyes now. I smile and stay still. I kneeling down on the street and let the container hit me. The container immediately stops. The driver shouts some bad words to me. I move from the place where I kneeling down. I just stand up and walking to the side and suddenly I can feel a bus hit my body. I rebound to the other side of the road with many blood out from my head.
I can see people gather around me. Some of them scream to the other person to call hospital. Slowly, I close my eyes. My head is really hurt. 10 minutes later, I still can hear a siren of ambulance. I can feel the medic team put me on the bed. They are trying to stop the blood out from my head. I think it’s too late because before so many of my blood already came out. Now, it’s so hard for me to breathe normally. My heart makes a fast beat and slowly turn slow, slow and then no beat again. I exhale my last breath. The doctors are still trying to save my life by pumping air to get into my lungs. But there’s no reaction from me. Suddenly, I can hear someone calling my name and crying. That’s MiJi. The girl I love. I could feel my heart started beating again, although only a small beats. I can feel the air back into my lungs. I breathed again. Yes, I breathe again though still a little hard for me to breathe normally. Only one voice that could wake me up is MiJi’s voice. I heard her voice calling my name. For a moment, I’m thinking what the hell she is doing here??? I want to ask her but I’m on my critical condition. I’m in ICCU room now.
Next day, I can feel my heartbeat is going normal again. I open my eyes and I see a beautiful face is crying beside my body. Wait a minute. If that is me who lying on that bed, then who am I??? Oh no. Does this mean that I’m dead?! NO!!! I still want to ask her what she is doing here, why she is here and why she is crying. I see a nurse covers my face with a white cloth. Other nurses begin to arrive and bring my bed into the corpse room. I see JungMin also there and he is holding my bag. MiJi is crying on his lap. The doctor comes out and says sorry to them that I was dead last night. WHAT?!
My body will be buried next to my grandparents’ graves. My mom, dad and my older sister are crying so hard. MiJi and JungMin are also crying hard.
--TO BE CONTINUED--
It’s raining outside. I don’t have any strength to get up from my bed. I’m going back to sleep. Suddenly, my phone is ringing. Who is that? Who is the nerd calling me at this time? Err… I need to sleep with this good season, this holiday and of course, I’m too tired after finished my work last night. I don’t want to answer the phone. Whoever it is, I don’t care. I just want to sleep.
1 hour past, but the phone is always ringing. I couldn’t sleep at all because of this noise. I decided to wake up and answer the phone. Ouch, my foot is hurt by something. Shit, my flat is totally in rush. I just stepped on my binder. I think this mess was from last night when I stressed out because of my work. Okay, I need to answer the phone now or I will go crazy.
“Hello?!”
“Hello. SeungHyun-ah, can you come out today? I have something to tell you. It’s an urgent”
“Oww, Hi, JungMin. Hmm, I don’t know. I will call you later if I can go out. Ok?!”
“But… SeungHyun-ie, why? Are you tired?”
“Hmm, yeah, kinda. I didn’t have a good sleep last night.”
“Oww, okay. I will wait but it’s kinda urgent. Hmm, it’s okay, take a rest. Bye”
He hangs up the phone and I’m back to my bed. I can’t sleep again. His word ‘URGENT’ is always on my mind. What kind of urgent? Err… I think I should meet him. I’m kinda a person like this, always curious about something and I have to find out what it is as soon as possible or I will go crazy. I call him.
“Hello?!”
“JungMin-ah, I think I can meet you today. I’m awake now”
“Really?! It’s okay if you can’t. Don’t push yourself”
“No. I’m okay. Totally awake and not tired anymore. Where I can meet you?”
“Hmm, I’m still at home but we can meet at our former school”
“Former school? High school or middle school?”
“Middle school. Around 07.00 PM?”
“Oww, okay. See you there”
“See ya”
06.15 PM, I’m ready to go to the Kyeong Gi Junior High School, my former school with many memories. Good and bad memories were creating there. I drive my car with a maximum speed. Yea, the school is far away from Seoul. Why Jung Min wanted to meet me there? I just parked my car and wow, he already there. He’s so fast.
I call him. His face seems so frustration. What happened with him? He makes a smirk on his face. He waves his hand. I can see his light brown skin hand waving at me. I can see he wears a red shirt with white hoodie. He is so handsome like that. As a man, I could say that he is totally handsome but why he never has a girlfriend even at once. He was so popular during school time. I was quite popular too but not really popular as him, but I had a girlfriend before. Yea, that’s my memory from this school. I walk approaching him.
His face suddenly becomes so serious. I hear what he said. I got a big shock when he said that words. I don’t know what I should say. I’m so confuse and my heart is in pain now after hearing his words. My head is spinning around now. I want to cry but it’s impossible.
"It's okay. I guess since there's not much left from our relationship. Stop apologizing, I'm not that hurt anyways. But, just please be a better boyfriend to her", that’s what I said unconsciously. His face becomes so happy. It hurts my heart. My deepest heart is really hurt. He hugs me.
“SeungHyun-ah, thank you so much!!! Do you know why I brought you here and said that?”
“Umm, I don’t know. Why?”
“This is the place where I met her for the first time. And also the first time we met each other and became close friends, weren’t we? Truthfully, I was falling for her first but she had fallen for you and you two ended as a couple. I became a crazy man that time. I couldn’t think straight, my heart was so in pain, I couldn’t do things correctly at that time. I even forced you to break up with her. But when I heard that you two broke up, I was so happy. Err… Oops, was I said that? Sorry, I didn’t mean it”
“Oh, that’s okay. I’m okay. Yea, I’m okay”. That’s the last word I said to him before we aparted.
On the way home, I can’t think straight. I drive my car so fast. I want to cry. I stop at the bridge which interlinks the way to Seoul. I take my phone and I start to press the number of someone. Yes, I called Kang Mi Ji. Woman we had just talked about.
“Hello? SeungHyun-ie?”
“…”
“Hello? Hello?? SeungHyun??”
“Hi, Mi Ji. How are you? Long time no see”
“I’m fine. Thank you. What about you?”
“I’m so so. Mi Ji, can we talk somewhere?”
“Hmm, I don’t know if I can today. Is it urgent?”
“Kinda of but it’s okay if you can’t”
“Okay, I will meet you in front of my house. I know that it’s really urgent”
“Okay, see you there”
I drive faster than before. I need to tell her about this. But then, I think again. I shouldn’t do this. I think it will just show her that I still love her. I don’t want her to misunderstanding me. I was the one who broke her up. I call her again and say that I can’t come. I feel so sorry to her.
I put all of my things in the couch. I can’t think straight. I lay my body on the couch and starting to cry. What is this feeling?! My deep heart is really hurt. Tomorrow, JungMin will say to MiJi that he loves her and hope that he can be her Boyfriend. Damn, just think about it, I really want to die. I still love her!!!
I take a long shower time. I cry under the shower. I only wearing my jeans and I sit on my desk. I take my journal book and start to write something. I don’t know why today so many of my tears always running down into my face. It’s so strange. Whenever I had a problem, I never had these tears. Maybe because it’s about a girl I loved. Also the radio has After School’s song BECAUSE OF YOU. Damn, even the song is really in with my situation.
I put the paper to the envelope and keep it on my desk. I take my cellphone and I go to my bed. I lay down there and I call JungMin.
“Hello?! SeungHyunnie, what’s up?? It’s already late.”
“Hello, JungMin. No, nothing happened. I just wanna ask you something. Can you meet me tomorrow at the Café near our office?? I have something to tell you”
“Owh, okay. But, are you really okay?! Your voice is so different”
“Yep, I’m okay. Don’t worry. See you there, tomorrow. At 10AM. Ok?!”
“Okay. Is there anything else???”
“Nope, that’s all. Bye”
“Bye, Nites”
---------------------------------------------------------------------
The Next Morning.
I can feel that my eyes are so heavy. I look into a mirror and I see that my eyes have a big lower eyelids. I couldn’t sleep well (again) last night. I wear a white t-shirt, jeans and black hat. I drive my car to the France Café near my office. I see JungMin there. Hey, it’s still 09.45 and he already there. Great. I think he really wants to know and curious what will I say. I open the door and JungMin waves his hand to me.
We talk about MiJi. I give him an advice if he becomes a couple with MiJi. I know it seems like I still love her. But thankfully JungMin doesn’t get it. I inhale more air and sigh a little.
“JungMin-ah, I just want you to know this before you become MiJi’s boyfriend”
“SeungHyun-ah, I don’t know if she will say yes or no. We still don’t know yet, right??”
“Yea, I know. But you need to know this”
“Okay, what’s it???”
“1st, She can't drink. And then she hates the fume of cigarettes. She also hates being alone so, be with her always. Last thing; make sure you always remember her birthday”
JungMin understood and leave me because he still has an appointment with MiJi. I still sit on the café with sad expression. The rain and the song in the café really fit with my situation. The café playing B2ST’s song SAY NO! (Please Take Care of My Girlfriend). Yupz, just like what I want. I hope MiJi will say no to JungMin.
30 minutes passed. I still sit at the café. My cellphone is suddenly ringing so loud. It’s JungMin. Damn it!! I can’t hear what he will say to me. But then I answer him. My face gets darker than before after hearing what he said. I know I make a rotten smile right now. I close my cellphone and then pay the bill of the cappucino which I drank recently. I go out from the café and start to walk in the rain. I can feel the tears of mine going down again. But because of the rain, it’s barely to show people that I’m crying right now. I look to the electronic shop and there are around 10 television playing Wheesung’s song JUREUREUK.What happen with this day?? Why the songs always fit with my situation today??
I cross the road without seeing the traffic light. It’s absolutely still green for the cars. I can’t think straight right now. A big container is in front of my eyes now. I smile and stay still. I kneeling down on the street and let the container hit me. The container immediately stops. The driver shouts some bad words to me. I move from the place where I kneeling down. I just stand up and walking to the side and suddenly I can feel a bus hit my body. I rebound to the other side of the road with many blood out from my head.
I can see people gather around me. Some of them scream to the other person to call hospital. Slowly, I close my eyes. My head is really hurt. 10 minutes later, I still can hear a siren of ambulance. I can feel the medic team put me on the bed. They are trying to stop the blood out from my head. I think it’s too late because before so many of my blood already came out. Now, it’s so hard for me to breathe normally. My heart makes a fast beat and slowly turn slow, slow and then no beat again. I exhale my last breath. The doctors are still trying to save my life by pumping air to get into my lungs. But there’s no reaction from me. Suddenly, I can hear someone calling my name and crying. That’s MiJi. The girl I love. I could feel my heart started beating again, although only a small beats. I can feel the air back into my lungs. I breathed again. Yes, I breathe again though still a little hard for me to breathe normally. Only one voice that could wake me up is MiJi’s voice. I heard her voice calling my name. For a moment, I’m thinking what the hell she is doing here??? I want to ask her but I’m on my critical condition. I’m in ICCU room now.
Next day, I can feel my heartbeat is going normal again. I open my eyes and I see a beautiful face is crying beside my body. Wait a minute. If that is me who lying on that bed, then who am I??? Oh no. Does this mean that I’m dead?! NO!!! I still want to ask her what she is doing here, why she is here and why she is crying. I see a nurse covers my face with a white cloth. Other nurses begin to arrive and bring my bed into the corpse room. I see JungMin also there and he is holding my bag. MiJi is crying on his lap. The doctor comes out and says sorry to them that I was dead last night. WHAT?!
My body will be buried next to my grandparents’ graves. My mom, dad and my older sister are crying so hard. MiJi and JungMin are also crying hard.
--TO BE CONTINUED--
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